This is a 5-minute read.
Have you ever been told to stop worrying about what other people think?
A child is born without awareness, consciousness or knowledge. In the early stages of life, their awareness is immediately to the mother and others.
They are not focussed on themselves and how they look and sound, what they are doing. They are focussed on how you look and sound and what you are doing. All senses are engaged to what others are doing.
The baby is playful and through your energy and connection, she becomes aware of herself. Your approval and through your smiles, your hugs, your kisses, your warm embrace stimulates her need for significance. She feels loved, valued and needed by you.
This is when an ego is born.
The baby’s reactions and responses are of what you and others think of her. It has nothing to do with what she thinks of herself
Quite simply the pattern of judgement and worrying about what others think is created at birth in a loving environment where unconsciously as babies we are seeking approval through gesture.
From child to adult a girl (or boy) is concerned with being judged because that is how they got love, connection and significance at birth. If we don’t consciously acknowledge this process, we may go through life seeking approval, validation, significance and connection by doing things to impress or entertain others.
It’s about changing the pattern of believing that what other’s think is important.
If you want to stop worrying about what others think about you and that feeling of being judged
- ACKNOWLEDGE – that the pattern started at birth. The same way for everyone.
- CREATE AWARENESS – that this pattern needs to change, and you consciously want to let go of what others think
- CHANGE – the pattern by choosing not to judge others.
Judgement is one of those negative (cancerous thoughts) that we may have about ourselves and others, that when you learn how to tame it. Move it out of your existence that you will find more room in your brain for the important things. Like generating love and kindness.
Judgement is the disease of people who are jealous, envious and manipulative.
Notice that when you compliment someone on how they look, it is still a judgement. Much like the mother acknowledging a child at birth for the goo-goo ga-ga smiles, it is all done in innocence. It is also setting that person up for needing constant reassurance on how they look.
Is that the type of message we want to send young women today?
We are all human, and some of us are learning about how to be super improved humans. Some of us acknowledge our shortcomings (like when we may choose to judge and change it) And some people – judge.
Which camp do you want to be in?
Make your house a judgement free zone.